Hewwwo! Wots of times I been shopping lately I seen wots of kiddies all arguwuing over the vendors, wike Gahum and I heard today at Den Dou... so I thinked maybe it was the new kinda fash'nable thing to do. So this is Widdle Wintah bringing you wot's hot in the kid's world my sissy and bwuvva poos.
First thing you gotta wemember is that you have to have a weally good 'xuse weady for why you are out at night time without Mommy, Daddy or any kind of growed ups. Because you SHOULDN'T BE OUT AT NIGHT IF YOU ARE A CHILD AVATAR. And then you need to forget any knowledge that you have of how 8 year olds WEALLY talk. If you wanna be an SL kiddy you have to speak with a speech impeddy - empeddy - a weally bad wisp.* Okay, so if you were a weal 8 year old who talked wike this you'd be getting speech thewwapy - either that or you'd be getting all beated up evvewy day after skool.
Next thing you need to know is that by being a kid, you have the wight - no, the DUTY to be as naughty as you can manage evvewywhere you go. Big Wintah once was the ministah at a wedding where the fwowah gurl diddun shut the (naughty word for making babies) up the whole time, and the page boi piddled on the pwetty white dwess. Big Wintah had to weally stop himself hard from punting the widdle (naughty word for poo's) into the next sim ovvah. Even though you are weally a growed up, and you'd give your own kiddies a backhand 'kwoss the face if they embawwessed you wike this, it's the only way that normal people will know that you are meant to be a kid and not a hobgobwin or a pixie.
And if you are a gurl - you don't have to give up your skin with wots and wots of make up! You don't even have to give up your boobies! I diddun know 8 year old gurls could have boobies till I started being a kid in SL, but evewwywhere I go I see them with big wacks and short skirts holding their Daddy's hand and begging them to buy the new hair fwom Twuth. I offen see these types of widdle gurls out with their Daddies but not offen with their Mommies. I wonder why that is?
So bois and gurls, this was Widdle Wintah showing you all how much fun you is missing out on. The main thing that I figured fwom being a kid is that its okay to infwict your woleplay upon anyone who is on the same sim as you. So Big Wintah decided that next time he has kiddy avs annoying him, its okay for him to start being a big mean vampy wight back at them and attack their pwecious necks. And wip open their chests, tear out their hearts and toss around their viscerae with a bloodthirsty howl. That's fair, isn't it? Oh yes – and its okay if you wanna post compwaints in the comments, I kinda expect that. Just don't use any mean nasty words.
Wemember, I'm only a widdle boi.
(*p.s. Who was the sadist who decided that "lisp" should be spelt with an "l" anyways?)
Worn - Knitted Racoon Cap by Onigiri
Hat hair by Curious Kitties
Ritalin skin by Kosh
Hello Gasmask shirt by [Riddle]
Sporty pants in pink by Amerie's Naughty
Hello Kitty Chucks by ::Line::
Frog Ring and Wristbands by [Love Soul]
Striped Gloves by Freak Couture